Day 10: Family and 的

★ 的 — the most common character in Chinese · when to drop it · siblings by age · 有 / 没有 · 30 min

★ 的 de is the single most frequent character in written Chinese, and it does one job: it links a modifier to a noun.

我的书 — my book. 老师的书 — the teacher's book. 很好的书 — a very good book.

And then, for the words closest to you, ★ you drop it: 我妈妈, not 我的妈妈. Section 2 is why.

1. ★★ 的 — A 的 B = "B of A"

### Whatever comes before 的 describes whatever comes after it.

★ English has two structures for this — "my book" and "the book of the teacher" — and Chinese has one. The modifier always comes first, 的 always sits between.

⚠️ 的 is a neutral tone. Light and quick — de, never dì or dé.

It also builds descriptions

★ That last pair is a relative clause — English needs "that/which/who" and puts it after the noun; Chinese puts the whole thing in front and joins it with 的. 我买的书 = "I-bought 的 book". You do not need to build these yet, but start noticing them — they are everywhere and they are Day 27's business.

2. ★★ When you drop 的

### Close relationships and your own institutions take NO 的.

★ The instinct is that these are not possessions — they are relationships you are inside of. (Korean does the same thing with 우리 엄마; Chinese does it by deleting the particle instead.)

⚠️ Using 的 here is not wrong, just slightly distant or emphatic — 我的妈妈 sounds like you are contrasting her with someone else's. Drop it by default.

★ And for things, 的 stays: 我的书, 我的车, 我的电话.

3. Family — split by age, not by speaker

★ Chinese splits siblings by age, like Korean and unlike English — there is no word for just "brother". ⚠️ But unlike Korean, it does not change with the speaker's gender — a man and a woman both say 哥哥. Two words to learn, not four.

⚠️ And grandparents split by side of the family

★ 外 wài means "outside" — the maternal line is historically "outside" the family name. Chinese kinship terms are the most specific of any major language, and this is only the first layer (uncles and aunts split four ways). Learn these six and stop there.

叔叔 shūshu (uncle) and 阿姨 āyí (aunt) are also used for any adult stranger of that generation — a child will call a shopkeeper 阿姨.

4. ★ 有 — to have, and it negates with 没

### ⚠️ 有 is the ONE verb that never takes 不. It is always 没有.

⚠️ 不有 does not exist in any context. This is the first crack in the 不/没 split that Day 23 completes.

★ 有 also means "there is / there are":

这儿有一家银行。 — There's a bank here.我家有五口人。 — There are five people in my family.

⚠️ 有 needs a measure word

我有一个哥哥 — not 我有一哥哥. ★ Any counted noun in Chinese needs a measure word, and that is tomorrow's whole lesson. For today, use 个 ge for everything.

Counting your family

★ 口 kǒu is used only for family members — it is the mouths-to-feed counter. For people in general it is 个 or the polite 位.

5. Dialogue

小明: 你家有几口人?Alex: 四口人。爸爸、妈妈、我姐姐和我。小明: 你姐姐做什么工作?Alex: 她是医生,在多伦多工作。小明: 你有弟弟妹妹吗?Alex: 没有。你呢?小明: 我是独生子女。但是我有很多表哥表姐。Alex: 你爷爷奶奶还在吗?小明: 我奶奶还在,八十五岁了。我外公外婆也都在。Alex: 太好了。这是你的照片吗?小明: 对,这是我们全家的照片。

★ Three things.① 我姐姐 · 你姐姐 · 我奶奶 — no 的, because they are family.② 你的照片 · 我们全家的照片 — 的 stays, because a photo is a thing.③ 爷爷奶奶 (father's side) vs 外公外婆 (mother's side) — both named separately, as they always are.

6. Exercises

A. ★ 的 or no 的?

1. 我___书 2. 我___妈妈 3. 老师___书 4. 我们___公司
2. 你___名字 6. 我___家 7. 他___车 8. 我___朋友

B. Translate with 的.

1. my book 2. your name 3. the teacher's car 4. a very good friend 5. Chinese tea

C. Which family word?

1. older brother 2. younger sister 3. father's father 4. mother's mother
2. only child 6. husband (casual)

D. ⚠️ 不 or 没?

1. 我___有钱。 2. 我___忙。 3. 我___是学生。 4. 我___有时间。

E. Translate.

1. I have an older brother.
2. I don't have a younger sister.
3. How many people are in your family?
4. There are four of us.
5. I'm an only child.

F. ⚠️ Fix the mistake.

1. 我不有钱。
2. 我的妈妈是老师。
3. 我有一哥哥。
4. 书的我
5. (a man, about his older brother) 我姐姐

7. Today's 10 sentences (flashcards)

1. 你家有几口人? Nǐ jiā yǒu jǐ kǒu rén? — How many in your family?
2. 我家有四口人。 — There are four of us
3. 我有一个哥哥。 Wǒ yǒu yí ge gēge. — I have an older brother
4. 我没有妹妹。 Wǒ méiyǒu mèimei. — I don't have a younger sister
5. 我是独生子女。 — I'm an only child
6. 我妈妈是老师。 — My mum is a teacher
7. 这是我的书。 — This is my book
8. 这是老师的车。 — That's the teacher's car
9. 你有时间吗? — Do you have time?
10. 我没有钱。 — I have no money

8. 📲 Upload to LangNote

Upload sections 1–2 (的) and section 7 → study language Chinese.

★ Write out your real family in Chinese tonight — names, ages, jobs, cities.Family is the most-asked topic in Chinese small talk, and having it ready means never building it under pressure.

⚠️ Tomorrow is measure words — the thing English has almost none of, and the biggest single day of week 2.

langNote is a paid subscription and this course recommends it. The 30 lessons are free and complete either way.