Day 10: Family and what you call people
Korean has no word for "brother".
It has four, and which one you use depends on two things English never asks about: whether they are older or younger than you, and whether you are male or female.
And these words are not only for relatives. Koreans call their friends and colleagues 형, 오빠, 누나, 언니 every day — which is why you were asked your age on Day 4. Today is where that pays off.
1. ★★ The four sibling words
### The word depends on the SPEAKER's gender, not only the sibling's.
| Older than you | A man says | A woman says |
|---|---|---|
| older brother | ★ 형 | ★ 오빠 |
| older sister | ★ 누나 | ★ 언니 |
| Younger than you | Either speaker |
|---|---|
| younger sibling | 동생 |
| younger brother | 남동생 |
| younger sister | 여동생 |
★ A brother and sister in the same family use different words for the same person. If 민수 is the eldest, his brother calls him 형 and his sister calls him 오빠.
⚠️ There is no gender-neutral, age-neutral word for "sibling" you can hide behind. The closest is 형제자매, which is a formal, written word — not something you say.
★ The memory aid that works:형/누나 are the pair a man uses. 오빠/언니 are the pair a woman uses.Learn them as two pairs, one per speaker, not as four separate words.
The rest of the family
| 가족 | family | 부모님 | parents (★ always with 님) | |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 아버지 / 아빠 | father / dad | 어머니 / 엄마 | mother / mum | |
| 할아버지 | grandfather | 할머니 | grandmother | |
| 아들 | son | 딸 | daughter | |
| 남편 | husband | 아내 | wife | |
| 삼촌 | uncle | 이모 / 고모 | aunt (mother's / father's side) | |
| 사촌 | cousin | 아이 / 애 | child, kid |
⚠️ Even aunts are split by side of the family — 이모 is your mother's sister, 고모 your father's sister. Korean kinship terms are far more specific than English's, and this is only the surface of it. Learn the ones above and stop there.
2. ★★ 형, 오빠, 언니 outside the family
This is the part that surprises everyone: you use these words for people you are not related to.
| A woman to an older male friend or colleague | 오빠 |
|---|---|
| A man to an older male friend or colleague | 형 |
| A woman to an older female friend | 언니 |
| A man to an older female friend | 누나 |
★ This is why age comes up within minutes of meeting someone (Day 4 §5). Until you know who is older, neither of you knows what to call the other, and Korean does not offer a neutral fallback.
In a shop or restaurant you will hear customers call staff 언니 or 이모. It is friendly, extremely common, and not rude.
⚠️ One caution for men and women alike: 오빠 said by a woman to a man carries warmth, and in the right context reads as flirtatious or romantic. It is completely normal among friends and colleagues — but it is not neutral the way 형 is between men. If you are unsure, use their name + 씨.
The school and work version
| 선배 | someone senior to you — earlier year, longer at the company |
|---|---|
| 후배 | someone junior to you |
| 선생님 | teacher — ★ also polite for any adult stranger |
| -씨 | 민수 씨 — peers, colleagues |
| -님 | attached to titles — 선생님, 손님 (customer), 부모님 |
3. ★ 우리 — "our", meaning "my"
### Koreans say 우리 (our) where English says "my".
| 우리 엄마 | ★ my mum | not "our mum" |
|---|---|---|
| 우리 집 | my house | |
| 우리 나라 | my country | |
| 우리 회사 | my company | |
| 우리 남편 | ★ my husband | (yes, really) |
★ The logic is that these things are shared, not owned. Your mother belongs to a family, not to you; your country to everyone in it. English's "my" sounds oddly possessive to a Korean ear.
⚠️ 우리 엄마 does not mean you and the listener have the same mother. Nobody will misread it. Saying 제 엄마 is not wrong but sounds stiff and slightly cold — use 우리.
And the ordinary possessives
| 제 | my | ★ humble — pairs with 저 |
|---|---|---|
| 내 | my | casual — pairs with 나 |
| ~의 | 's | written; said as 에; usually dropped in speech |
제 이름은 알렉스예요. — My name is Alex.제 친구예요. — He's my friend.⚠️ But 우리 엄마, 우리 집, 우리 학교 — family and shared institutions take 우리.
4. ★ There is no verb "to have"
Korean says things exist rather than that you have them.
| Literally | ||
|---|---|---|
| 형이 있어요. | an older brother exists | I have an older brother |
| 동생이 없어요. | a younger sibling doesn't exist | I don't have a younger sibling |
| 시간 있어요? | does time exist? | Do you have time? |
| 돈이 없어요. | I have no money |
### 있어요 = there is / I have · 없어요 = there isn't / I don't have
⚠️ The thing takes 이/가, not 을/를 — 형이 있어요, never 형을 있어요. (Day 5's subject particle — the brother is the one doing the existing.)
★ 없어요 is a single word meaning "does not exist". English needs not plus a verb; Korean has a dedicated negative verb. Same for 몰라요 (don't know) against 알아요.
Counting your family
| 가족이 몇 명이에요? | How many people in your family? |
|---|---|
| 네 명이에요. | Four |
| 형제가 있어요? | Do you have siblings? |
| 누나 한 명하고 남동생 한 명 있어요. | One older sister and one younger brother |
(★ 하고 = "and", joining nouns. 와/과 is the written equivalent.)
5. A first note on honorifics
Korean does not only raise the listener (해요체) — it can also raise the person you are talking about. Three verbs you should recognise now:
| Plain | Honorific | |
|---|---|---|
| 있어요 | ★ 계세요 | to be / to exist |
| 먹어요 | ★ 드세요 / 잡수세요 | to eat |
| 자요 | ★ 주무세요 | to sleep |
부모님이 계세요. — My parents are alive / are here.맛있게 드세요. — Enjoy your meal (what staff say to you).
⚠️ You will hear all three constantly and you barely need to produce them yet. 드세요 is the one to have ready — it is said to you in every restaurant.
★ And the rule that catches English speakers: you do not raise yourself or your own family when speaking to an outsider. 저는 밥 먹어요, never 드세요 about yourself.
6. Dialogue
민수: 알렉스 씨, 가족이 몇 명이에요?Alex: 네 명이에요. 부모님하고 누나 한 명 있어요.민수: 누나요? 알렉스 씨는 남자니까 누나가 맞네요.Alex: 네. 사라는 여자예요. 그래서 사라는 언니라고 해요.민수: 맞아요! 누나는 무슨 일 하세요?Alex: 의사예요. 서울에 살아요. 우리 부모님은 캐나다에 계세요.민수: 아, 그렇군요. 동생은 없어요?Alex: 네, 없어요. 민수 씨는요?민수: 저는 형이 두 명 있어요. 그리고 여동생 한 명이요.Alex: 가족이 많네요!
★ Four things.① Alex is male, so his older sister is 누나; Sara is female, so hers is 언니 — same person, two words.② 우리 부모님 — "my parents", with 우리.③ 계세요, not 있어요 — parents get the honorific.④ 동생은 없어요? → 네, 없어요. ★ The negative-question rule from Day 3 §5, with the verb repeated so nothing is ambiguous.
7. Exercises
A. ★ Which word? (the speaker is given)
- A man, about his older brother 2. A woman, about her older brother
- A man, about his older sister 4. A woman, about her older sister
- Anyone, about a younger brother
B. 우리 or 제?
- ___ 엄마 2. ___ 이름 3. ___ 나라 4. ___ 친구 5. ___ 집
C. 있어요 or 없어요?
- I have an older sister. 2. I don't have a younger sibling.
- Do you have time? 4. I have no money.
D. Translate.
- How many people are in your family?
- There are four of us.
- I have one older brother and one younger sister. (you are male)
- My parents live in Canada. (honorific)
- He's my friend.
E. Honorific or plain?
- 부모님이 ___. (are here) 2. 저는 밥 ___. (eat) 3. 맛있게 ___. (said to a customer)
F. ⚠️ Fix the mistake.
- (a woman) 우리 형이 있어요.
- 제 엄마는 의사예요.
- 형을 있어요.
- (about yourself) 저는 밥 드세요.
- (a man, about his older sister) 언니가 있어요.
Answers
A. 1. 형 2. 오빠 3. 누나 4. 언니 5. 남동생 B. 1. 우리 2. 제 3. 우리 4. 제 (or 우리) 5. 우리 C. 1. 누나가 있어요. 2. 동생이 없어요. 3. 시간 있어요? 4. 돈이 없어요. D. 1. 가족이 몇 명이에요? 2. 네 명이에요. 3. 형 한 명하고 여동생 한 명 있어요. 4. 우리 부모님은 캐나다에 계세요. 5. 제 친구예요. E. 1. 계세요 2. 먹어요 3. 드세요 F. 1. 오빠 — a woman says 오빠 2. 우리 엄마 — family takes 우리 3. 형이 있어요 — 있다 takes 이/가 4. 먹어요 — never raise yourself 5. 누나 — a man says 누나
8. Today's 10 sentences (flashcards)
- 가족이 몇 명이에요? — How many are in your family?
- 네 명이에요. — There are four of us
- 형이 있어요. — I have an older brother (male speaker)
- 언니가 한 명 있어요. — I have one older sister (female speaker)
- 동생은 없어요. — I don't have a younger sibling
- 우리 엄마는 선생님이에요. — My mum is a teacher
- 우리 부모님은 서울에 계세요. — My parents are in Seoul
- 제 친구예요. — He's my friend
- 시간 있어요? — Do you have time?
- 맛있게 드세요. — Enjoy your meal
9. 📲 Upload to LangNote
Upload section 1 (the four sibling words), section 3 (우리) and section 8 → study language Korean.
| Mission | What to do with it today |
|---|---|
| 🎧 Podcast | The dialogue — listen for 누나 and 언니 used about the same person |
| ✍️ Dictation | 있어요 / 없어요 and 계세요 — short and easily confused |
| 🗣 Shadowing | Today's key mission. Describe your real family, 60 seconds |
| 📖 Vocab | ★ Enter the sibling words as two pairs by speaker gender, not four items |
| 🎭 Role-play | Ask about the tutor's family, answer about yours |
★ Work out your own set tonight. Your gender decides two of the four words you will ever use. Write the actual sentences — 형이 있어요, 여동생이 없어요 — and say them out loud. Family is the most-asked topic in Korean small talk, and having it ready means never building it under pressure.
Tomorrow: 을/를, the object particle — and the sentence order that is the opposite of English.
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